Call it emergent behavior then; whether through uncoordinated coordination of the media/marketing world, or uncoordinated coordination of peer/social pressures, these expectations exist.

I have literally been shut down in a conversation, in person, at work, more than once, because I was a white male in tech.

It certainly takes a special kind of mental gymnastics to figure that a problem that disproportionately affects men is another example of men excluding women from something...

it's not a way of putting things, it's fact