I'd have to think about this more to decide whether or not it's true, my life is more sustainable than it ever has been before. In pure watt hour accounting, I wager I'm energy-cheaper than most city people who deeply care about things like that.
You're mistaken about wells requiring filtration.
> If anything in your janky setup breaks and you can't fix it in a few days, you will find yourself at a motel and fully back "on the grid".
This, like much of your reply, is rather presumptuous and ungenerous. There are some good discussion points in your reply. Unfortunately you've also stated as incontrovertible fact several things that are simply incorrect. I don't see much room for an actual conversation in your choice of words.
(AutoCAD with modules for stress analysis and building design libs would cost you $20k or so, but it can probably be rented as cloud license.)
Rigging can be rented, even work clothes and power tools. Even then the tools are not super expensive anyway.
The expensive parts are rental of lifter, crane and mixer machines as well as good operator. Barring that, more people to set up the building and much more wood and metal rigging.
Building is cheap compared to prime land and marketing or sales markup, as well as paying off credit. (Most buildings are built with financial leverage.)
You're more "on the grid" than you think. Those solar panels were built in China (probably), how did you get them? Where will you go to get replacement parts? Where do you go to get gasoline for your generator? How is that easier than paying a power bill every month? You can't drink straight out of the well, you'll need a filtration system which needs maintenance, why not just pay a water bill with a hookup from a city?
You haven't dropped out of society at all. You're intensely reliant on society right now. If anything in your janky setup breaks and you can't fix it in a few days, you will find yourself at a motel and fully back "on the grid". I'm not saying you need to be a condo living yuppie, but surely there's a happy middle ground.