"It appears plastic-based life forms co-evolved alongside carbon-based life on this body, how interesting, we thought only carbon-based life was possible but there is just so much microplastic with large concentrations in these ancient civilization centers! It also appears they dug up, refined, and relocated the bulk of the uranium and plutonium to this cave system, they must have worshiped it. How bizarre, they could have used this in Snarlsfarogogogog reactors with almost 100% efficiency and only had transmuted metals left as a byproduct. And what is with all of these 'AOL' squares and circles?! This must have been their servant class but there's no discernible means of locomotion"

"They took a garden and turned it into a parking lot."

"If this is paradise I wish I had a lawnmower"

Like, what a nice overlords they ended up to be?

Less about that we graduated from savagery, but more how long it took.