It's a tough thing to express. Certainly, we feel like good people are ones who aren't simply calculating a benefit.

But that doesn't mean people don't expect a benefit, it's just that the people we admire expect it without crudely calculating it.

I'd say in a lot of ways, a person entering into a relationship expects benefit and expects to form an "us", a commonality, a partnership, with their other, so that what benefits is "us", the common group, and not simply the individual as a completely separated entity unconcerned with the other.