> I've been trying to receive "euthanasia" for myself. I suffer gender dysphoria.

I'm sorry to read that you want to die, but I hope very much that you continue to fail. You are valuable, you make the world better by being in it and it will be worse when you do die. Yes, you have a mental condition, but that is no reason to hate yourself: you deserve love, not hate. Life is tough for everyone, some more than others, but it's also full of joy & beauty, and you're part of that joy & beauty.