Let's see, I just upgraded to Android Studio 3.1, opened one of my previous ridiculously simple apps, and voila:

    Could not find com.android.tools.build:gradle:3.0.1.
    Searched in the following locations:
        https://jcenter.bintray.com/com/android/tools/build/gradle/3.0.1/gradle-3.0.1.pom
        https://jcenter.bintray.com/com/android/tools/build/gradle/3.0.1/gradle-3.0.1.jar
    Required by:
        project :
    Add Google Maven repository and sync project
    Open File

Okay, I hit the "Add Google Maven repository and sync project", and now we have:

    Could not GET 'https://jcenter.bintray.com/org/ow2/asm/asm/5.1/asm-5.1.pom'. Received status code 502 from server: Bad Gateway
    Enable Gradle 'offline mode' and sync project

I don't know what the hell any of this means -- I'm not a Java/Gradle/etc. person at all, just forced to use this pile of mess for Android -- so I cluelessly hit "Enable Gradle 'offline mode' and sync project" hoping it will resolve the error, and now:

    No cached version of org.ow2.asm:asm:5.1 available for offline mode.
    Disable Gradle 'offline mode' and sync project

Created a new project and it compiled successfully. Cut-and-paste classes, here we come!

On another note, creating a blank Android app results in nothing short of 87 files. Does it really have to be this complicated? Do we really have to use this gradle nonsense? (90%+ of the errors I get hen upgrading Android Studio say something about gradle). Most frameworks on other platforms are simple and elegant enough that it is possible to memorize the minimal "hello world" example and implement it with vim, and the IDE is just there for convenience, not out of necessity.