A practical vision of computing without these things is challenging, though!
At least on the server side, that's realistic. Big companies like Google already run their own trusted code on their own hardware. For everyone else, it's not impossible to move from VPS hosting to "bare metal cloud" like Scaleway offers.
(Vision for the Future™: instead of their tied-to-Linux "someone else's Raspberry Pi" experience, it would be a bunch of tiny single core processors, each connected to their own tiny DRAM chip. You upload unikernel images or CloudABI binaries (that would be then wrapped into unikernels) into the Cloud™, where the load balancer boots up your images on-demand on as many of these tiny computers as needed. RAM is zeroed before boot.)
The other big environment with tons of untrusted code is of course the web browser. This is significantly more ridiculous, but: why not embed a ton of tiny simple in-order ARM cores without any shared cache into desktop processors, and run JS/WASM on them? (One core used per origin per site) :D
I definitely chuckled. :) On a more serious note- I'd bet at least a couple bucks it would be possible (albeit super weird and difficult) to channel information through hardware-acceleration mechanisms. Lots of rendering happens on the GPU these days.
rr does just this! I think it uses the "instructions retired" performance counter as its "fake time"; that turns out to be deterministic enough for its purposes. Whether it's deterministic enough in a security context, I don't know for sure.
But this approach, though it can run threaded software, will not let untrusted software (which should really mean all software!) use more than one real core or hardware thread.
Only if you define 'deterministically' to mean 'determined only by the program's own legitimately accessible context'. These timing side-channel attacks work precisely because the processor performs in a deterministic and detectable manner, but does so based on information which the attacking program should not be able to access.
The program is equivalent to a pure function from (state, events) to (state, actions) and the computing device that evaluates this function can't leak any information to the function without evaluating it incorrectly. It can still leak information in how long it takes to evaluate the function, but there is no direct way to get this information back into the function.
You could ask the user what time it is, or how long something took, but that starts to look suspicious fast!
You just need to refine statistics. The underlying program can‘t be solved in a physical universe.
If the randomizations have such an effect that data sniffing is still possible but its speed is 1 bit per week, trying to sniff something interesting becomes impractical. (Or not; depends on your threat model.)
Given that "silicon is cheap" why don't we work around these problems by ensuring that processes within different security domains run on separate cores with their own cache and branch prediction cache? At context-switch, flush all that.
This is similar to eval(). The operating system always needs a way to load new code, but you don't need it in the language, or least not in a sandboxed language.
It's also more consistent with the abstract programming model that we typically use. A new version of a function is normally considered compatible with the previous one based on the values it returns, not the details of its timing (within reason).
We often depend on this correctness vs. performance separation to be able to make performance improvements easily. It's very convenient to be able to swap in faster code without worrying that you'll break any callers. It's also convenient not to have to write constant-time functions (to avoid information leaks) most of the time.
Disable TSC access, lower clock_gettime precision, make clock_gettime return fuzzy (randomized) time. Randomize CPU frequency to make usage of spinning threads for time measurement hard. Insert randomized delays into untrusted binaries, kinda like DTrace inserts probes (i.e. imagine a JavaScript JIT that inserts no-ops all over the compiled code, and randomly changes these to random sleeps). etc.