> This is not something I have completely thought through

Indeed. "Thar oughtta be a law!" is always the least interesting response to a problem. Essentially your solution to a problem is to outlaw the problem.

Then the fun part is always left to committee. "How do we split it up?" "How do we define the thing we are trying to outlaw...?"

You could brand it the "War on Problems". The president could appoint a Problems Czar. I'm sure we'll need a Anti-Problems Department, too.