Things related to friendzone will go in part 3. In short: no, just being nice is not enough (cf: no one will hire you just because haven't stolen anything).

Though, the most common thing that is missing is not taking risks - most of the time nerd fail to ask question (and of course, rejection is possible - but still better to be stuck in a limbo).

Its not even that, its disingenuous because you're being their friend in the hopes you'll get a payout.

I think we are talking about two different phenomena. (You mention a sneaky way how to get into a relationship, I mentioned lack of communication.)

This. One of my biggest takeaways from the book by Mark Manson - Models.

There are many books on the subject, Models is a good one. I don't see why anyone would waste time trying to write some web page about why nerds in particular have a hard time dating.

Social awkwardness is a well covered subject in this and many other books. Even better, it's covered by people who have more than theory to back their ideas.