Addendum - these ideas are not original to me. If this way of thinking resonates with you, here are a couple of the things I've been watching and listening to that taught me to think this way. They're worth your time.

Men Have Problems Too: http://theredpillmovie.com/

Everyone's A Mess And Also Awesome: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nr9bVe68OZM