While you disdain Haskell's use in the industry, there are researchers much relevant to the IT industry than any of us, that happen to be on payroll from Facebook and Microsoft.

Maybe you should spend some time learning how FB and Microsoft use Haskell, you might be surprised with what you find.

As a clue, try to find out how C# and VB got LINQ, maybe you will find the right MSR paper by a certain Erik Meijer.