If you live near an indoor rock climbing facility, I'd recommend checking it out! Rock climbing can be done in an "extreme" way, but also can be done in a very beginner-friendly, incremental way.

I climb, have lots of friends who climb who do software. The two seem to go together well.

Yes - it's a wonderfully technical activity.

Anything that gets you into flow at a high heart rate. Basketball, lifting, and intense yoga fit this for me. I've read that Tai Chi can fill this as well but I've never tried. Though basketball has given me more serious injuries than skateboarding and snowboarding ever did.

> What if you are afraid of extreme sports?

There's a quote in a jump plane that I really like: "you just have to get comfortable with fear"[1].

> What alternatives would you recommend?

Anything that requires you to be 100% focused on the task at hand, or physical exertion (or even both).

The catch is that you need to feel satisfaction from it, and humans suck at predicting what activity is going to give them satisfaction, that's why it's best to just go ahead and try different stuff, see what works.

You can usually tell within the first few minutes if it's for you or not.

[1] - http://i.imgur.com/zzszs.jpg

I'm chuckling at "You can usually tell within the first few minutes if it's for you or not." in the context of Skydiving. I did a 10kft tandem jump for my first, and it was the first time I'd ever been on a plane. It was terrifying! I was actually more comfortable under the chute than I was in the plane.

You're right though, some activities give me a big ol' "meh", and some make me feel joy right off the bat. Don't know for sure until you try it.

This year's new activity is going to be snowkiting, if we get any snow... (Snowless-November in the Canadian Prairies? What the heck?!)

> I was actually more comfortable under the chute than I was in the plane.

Even after 10 years, the ride to altitude is the scary part for me -- and others that had the decency to admit it -- as soon as I'm out the door, everything calms down in the body, it's weird.

I'm guessing it's because while in the plane you have very little control over what happens, and the exit is especially dangerous because a lot of weight (skydivers) shift to one part of the plane.

> Snowless-November in the Canadian Prairies? What the heck?!

I feel your pain, we haven't had a decent winter in a few years now.

Take up a musical instrument. Music can be insanely difficult and challenging. You have to be 100% focused on the activity, it has a physical aspect to it, and successes are very rewarding. It's not as physical as extreme sports of course, but is similar to sports in that the more effort you put in to practice (workout) every day, the greater the rewards. IMO it's also good for keeping things like carpal tunnel at bay (I play piano, but most instruments have finger/hand things going on).

Like sports, you are never "there", you are always just getting better. You can take a break and play easier pieces just for fun, challenge yourself and practice difficult pieces, or focus on one specific area for improvement like rhythm/counting, switching from classical to jazz for a while, playing crazy orchestra reductions with way too many notes, improving your ear by trying to play along with pop music, etc.

The other nice thing about music is it's convenient to take a half-hour break from work, play/practice a while, then go back to work. It's funny: while I love playing music, I don't much like listening to it when others are playing it. I can spend 2 hours working on Chopin, but am bored after about 15 minutes listening to classical music, even if it's with someone at a concert. Just doesn't do it for me to listen. Played Fr Horn in a band and that was a lot of fun too, lead to friendships, etc.

If you're into it, music is a huge field that you'll never outgrow, even on a single instrument.

I did rowing ('crew') at University. There's something quite geeky about rowing - there were 6 CS guys rowing in the boat with me. There's something about perfecting one stroke that you do over and over again. You don't have to be a teenager to start doing it either - most clubs will accept novices of any age.

Most "extreme" sports have differing levels of ability. You can start mountain biking on relatively flat smooth trails, and work your way up to more difficult one when you feel more comfortable.