I am pretty dedicated to living a car-free life, and on paper SD seemed like it MIGHT work. I used car2go when needed and cycled or rode a 170cc scooter for the first few months. After my wife got hit by someone who drove off it really soured me on the city, as did dripping in sweat any time I went anywhere on my bike.
However, I also acknowledge that these responses are largely emotional. People are killed by automobiles everywhere, and riding in the cold rain isn't much fun either.
I ended up moving back to Dublin (Ireland).
I'm in tech. I work in robotics and VR. Granted, the robotics company is in SF, but the VR company is down here. I do have to drive to work with my own car. But my BF can use car2go to get downtown when I've got the car.
We rent in NP and pay around $1000 (we got lucky) for a 1bd. We're anticipating needing a 2bd within the next two years (he's got two kids) and that should run us up to $2000 by the time we need it. That'll work though, our incomes can support that. If either of the startups I work at do well, then we'll be looking to buy in the next 5-6 years.
Housing is nowhere near as expensive here as it is in SF or NYC, though. Even better if you're DINK (dual income, no kids). We probably have to pay more for his kids from a previous marriage than we would if they were ours (child support any whatnot), but it's possible to afford housing here.
Where are you now?
Lest anyone think I'm an immigrant to CA who just couldn't hack the culture shock, I'm a Californian who grew up there- I spent thirty years there and then moved to Ireland on a lark (and working holiday visa). I liked Ireland so much I stayed for about 2.5 years, then moved to San Diego to start a company, then after that failed moved back to Dublin. It's not perfect, but the weather's cooler and the cycling a hell of a lot better than SD.
I'm not sure about your complaint with SD being too hot. 2 miles from the beach should be great weather. I lived in San Diego for 20 of my 35 years of life (moved away in 2011) and the weather is one of the best things about that place. Some people prefer a cooler climate though.
It sounds like you would much rather live in SF. Cooler weather, better cycling, and better public transit. For me, I prefer SD. I hated the SF weather and the public transit still wasn't really that good (BART is too limited).
I would love to move back to SD but housing costs are just too damn high and I don't want to live in the cheap parts where its hotter and boring. I'm going to be looking at rural Oregon or Washington when I hopefully move back to the US in a couple years.