Re:Ask HN: Getting harassed at work for my sexuality, what s...
by hluska on Sunday April 10, 2016 @06:34PM
(#11468508)
I'm a hetero guy so I've never been in your situation. Consequently, take this advice (and the question that precedes it) with several grains of salt.
Who do you have to talk to? Do you have a solid support network of people who know you're bi and support you unconditionally??
I ask because the next steps are potentially hard, especially if you're surrounded by the type of prep school types who tend to stick together in groups.
I need to edit this in response to an excellent comment by mtviewdave, who suggested that depending on where you live, surreptitiously recording a conversation may be illegal. Look into the law first!!(Source - https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=11468484)
That said, the next time that you hear them talking about you, try to record the conversation. This prevents a you versus them situation where their own best witnesses are the co-accused. Their defense could (and likely will) be that you misheard them...
Once you have it recorded, I wouldn't bother trying to tell them to grow up and knock it off. Simply walk into HR and make a formal complaint.
I understand that you've never been the type to go to the teacher, but seriously dude, someone sitting two seats down from you may be in a deep closet and their closet could be deepening (and get more lonely) with each of their barbs.
I'm sorry that you're going through this and I wish I could do more. Best of luck and good on you for coming here to talk about this.
Who do you have to talk to? Do you have a solid support network of people who know you're bi and support you unconditionally??
I ask because the next steps are potentially hard, especially if you're surrounded by the type of prep school types who tend to stick together in groups.
I need to edit this in response to an excellent comment by mtviewdave, who suggested that depending on where you live, surreptitiously recording a conversation may be illegal. Look into the law first!!(Source - https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=11468484)
That said, the next time that you hear them talking about you, try to record the conversation. This prevents a you versus them situation where their own best witnesses are the co-accused. Their defense could (and likely will) be that you misheard them...
Once you have it recorded, I wouldn't bother trying to tell them to grow up and knock it off. Simply walk into HR and make a formal complaint.
I understand that you've never been the type to go to the teacher, but seriously dude, someone sitting two seats down from you may be in a deep closet and their closet could be deepening (and get more lonely) with each of their barbs.
I'm sorry that you're going through this and I wish I could do more. Best of luck and good on you for coming here to talk about this.