Having a six-figure household income at all puts you in the top 15% in the US. Having a $400k salary puts you very close to the top 1%. I would say anyone making enough to put them, by themselves, in the top 15% is arguably making a "big salary". The Valley has really warped the perception within this industry in particular and the US in general as to what "normal" money is.
400k is a good executive salary. i guess you could call it 'big' but it doesn't strike me as something 'too high' or as an indicator of something nefarious going on. it's in line with very senior executive pay at the c-level or a very senior VP/MD. someone like that probably oversees up to 8 or 9 figures of business.
Also, engineering societies generally are based in major cities.
It is. Your perspective is warped.