ycquestion

I have no kids and I feel very weird about my age. I am about to turn 40 and feel 30 and 60 at the same time. I think of myself as 30, but really feel like 60. I have little energy left after a day at work or even on the weekends. I cannot consistently put energy behind any effort. I used to hack on my side projects before and after work. Now it's a great success if I do it 2-3 hours/month. I feel my mental state declining and worry that I won't be able to get another job ever again. When I say "mental state" I mean capability, energy and maybe even sanity. I think too much about unknowable things like sentients, nature of reality, purpose of life and sometimes wonder if reality is real and it demotivates me. Life feels on rails, like a movie playing in front of me, more than anything I can interact with. I feel like a passenger. Maybe it's just a result of depression and not old age.

I am in the interesting situation that I am currently exploring two different ideas with two different groups of people. Both ideas are in completely different spaces and I am not sure yet which one I think is more promising. Due to the very different nature of the ideas it's currently easy for me as the potential, technical co-founder to divide my attention between those. Would there be any issue if I applied independently with both separate teams? Obviously I wouldn't be able to follow through on both if they got both accepted, but that scenario seems extremely unlikely to me.