shange

R.I.P. cryingbitches.com, gone before I even knew her

I would also say people don't need to be having sex... even if they are unhappy about it.

I suffered from treatment-resistant depression for over ten years. In my case, time definitely did not heal, and psych meds that were tried did not help significantly. Felt like everyone had gotten used to my depression and did not take it seriously. Was convinced that I had "terminal" depression. Until at a low point, when visiting a new doctor (non-psych) for a routine check-up, the doctor who I'd never met before told me that I seemed so low that she wasn't comfortable sending me home alone and sent me to the emergency room. At that point I started intensive therapy, learned DBT (Dialectical Behavioral Therapy) skills, and was started on meds that actually did help. I'm now proud and happy to say that I've been largely free of depression for the 5 years since then. Sure there are low times, but coping skills and closely managing meds have helped greatly.

Mostly here to say: If you're depressed to the point where you're seriously thinking about killing yourself, you have a life-threatening illness. IMO, it should be treated as such.

Some of the contents of this article basically amount to DBT skills (i.e. "Get out of bed even if you don't want to") so I recommend looking into those if these types of suggestions sound helpful to you. But suggesting that somebody who is suffering should binge watch TV to wait it out seems unhelpful and counterproductive to me. Take it seriously, and seek help if you need. Things can get better.

Of course wanting to win your tennis match / soccer game / ping pong tournament isn't inherently toxic. I don't want to get in a match of word definitions here but the point of the "toxic" part of the term is that it's the part that does harm.

The specific usage that I was trying to point out was not correct which I stand by is the "I assumed from the phrase 'toxic masculinity' that it means 'masculinity is toxic'" and the accompanying weird anti-feminist-backed-by-misguided-logic mindset that seems unfortunately common on HN

Toxic masculinity: "The concept of toxic masculinity is used in psychology and media discussions of masculinity to refer to certain cultural norms that are associated with harm to society and to men themselves." - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toxic_masculinity

It's not the same as misandry. "Homophobia" sounds like it means "afraid of homosexuals" but that is incorrect. "Toxic masculinity" kind of sounds like it means "all masculinity is toxic" but that is incorrect.

I am female, have been diagnosed with anxiety and depression, have been to therapy, and am interested in gender theory. These comments read like unguided group therapy mixed with fuzzy realization of the concept of toxic masculinity.