Pao gets hate because she's incompetent, vain, and an ass. Ballmer got hate, too. You know why? Because he's incompetent, vain, and an ass. There are two intersecting patterns here: first, that vain, incompetent asses get hate; second, that most of the people in positions of power are vain, incompetent asses. Maybe people tend to notice more often when they're women, but the men aren't any different and they get plenty of well-deserved hate too.