Sounds like you're in the majority.
Something s = function(....); return s;
This allows me to put a break point if I need one in the future. Unfortunately Sonar is configured to say this is a Major bug. It breaks the build until I have "return function(...)." Every damn time! Now I use (assert s != null);
If a company can come up with a default configuration that Jenkins or Bamboo can pull, great! I love it. Until then I literally have to push to SVN and wait for the Sonar nag email.
For example, you can get very fine grained control over pylint by asking it to generate a config file, and reading through it (it's remarkably well commented).
I think it boils down to being timid and not wanting to impose one standard on others which reduces the importance of coding standards to tabs vs spaces -_-'
Linters that can't rank rule violations sensibly, have bad defaults and opinionated stylistic rules quickly become more trouble than they're worth.
If somebody comes out with a better linter, though, that isn't verbose and just catches truly problematic code consistently without needing a ton of customization, I'll use that for sure.
But if you're in virmundi's situation, that's more a people problem than a technical one, and no tool will save you there.
When the output is as long as your arm and you have pick through it with a fine toothcomb to find the things that matter (and even they aren't necessarily causes of bugs), the whole idea becomes substantially less appealing.