"Will you get your work done this week?" "To do that I'll need X and Y"
If you feel pressured to lie to your boss, that's a serious problem. Is it possible you're misreading him? Do others on the team feel the same way?
Have you brought this up with him previously?
At a tactical level start translating his requirements down to less aggressive language in your head.
Your long term plan though should be to tackle his communication style head on in a relaxed way. If you have regular one on one's start addressing this there. If you don't talk to him about organising them or organise them yourself as a way to stay on point priority wise.
You may end up figuring out you have a shitty boss, but any half way decent boss wants to improve so if you give him the opportunity they often will.
> 14. Don’t shoot down ideas until it’s necessary.
> 25. Don’t judge too quickly; you’re right less often than you think. Even if you’re sure you’re right in any given case, wait until everyone’s opinion is heard.
> 30. Most conflict happens because people don’t feel heard. Sit down with each person and ask them how they feel. Listen carefully. Then ask again. And again. Then summarize what they said back to them. Most of the time that will solve the problem.
> 34. Use non-violent communication — it’s the best method I know of to critique people’s behavior without offending them. It smells like a management fad, but it really works (I promise).
Number #34 includes a link to an article on non-violent communication which pretty much sums up why I feel stressed and pressured at work all the time. It's not so much the deadlines, although they are stressful sometimes, it's more my managers communication style.
> Say you’re an early employee at a startup. You’re probably working 12 to 14 hours a day doing the work of three people. So which question would you prefer to hear from a teammate?
A. Will you get your work done this week? B. What do you need to hit your deadline this week?
The first is an example of a closed question. It requires a “yes” or “no” response and does nothing to acknowledge your dedication or address your feelings about it. You know there’s a right answer and a wrong answer, and just knowing that is likely to make you tense, agitated and defensive.
http://firstround.com/review/power-up-your-team-with-nonviol...
My manager is constantly asking type A questions. It took my a long time to understand why I felt so pressured and this is exactly why. He just wants to hear yes and if he hears no, it feels like I've done something wrong. He is willing to help if that's the case, but every meeting feels like a hostile negotiation.