Sturgeons law applies to products too, but because the market is now international only the best products are worth buying so most ads are either for crap, trying to get you to buy products that aren't the best bargain or brand awareness ads which can't be made to be worth seeing.
If you want better targeting why is there no place where I can select the kind of things I am interested in? Why can't I take an ad and say I have no interest in that kind of product (In online dating the only thing that matters is traffic, so I would never go to a pay site)? It is valuable information to you, allows better targeting and a better chance I will buy the product.
Why is it that when I search for "apartment in <city>" I get 3 months of ads for the same apartment listing site, rather than for sites that will mail me curtains, which would be something I wanted?
Make ads worth watching and I will, but this is a 3-way road now - you are going to have to make the ads worth it for both the publisher, the client and the user because as a user I now have options if you don't.
You can do that with Facebook ads, can't you?
The ad companies aren't whining, the users are. We do try to show you better ads and its not to be nice but because they would naturally perform better. Showing you stuff you want is good for you, for the ad companies and the advertisers. However people also complain about being tracked and tracking is required to know about your interests and show you the right stuff. You can't have one without the other.
Using adblock means denying publishers any revenue for their content that you're reading for free and stops ad networks from learning more about your interests to give you better ads.
So, which would you rather have? Or do you have a better solution?