Obviously I'll have to come to terms with the fact that "people in the world" have different priorities to mine regarding ethics; that doesn't change the fact that I believe certain things to be wrong and that (independently) I believe people should be held accountable for actions, even if just following orders (which was the original argument I was responding to).
Working for the NSA isn't a human rights issue, another reason that the gay marriage thing is a straw man. I'm not claiming someone shouldn't have the right to work for them, I'm just saying if they're instructed to do "wrong things" that those things are still "wrong" even if you're only doing them for your boss. (for whatever values of "wrong" -- hence your point about ethics being individual)
You've conveniently created a nice sliding scale from those that marry their same-sex partners all the way to those employed by the NSA and if the present (international) trends are any indication you may very well be right in the way you ordered those, maybe the last two should be swapped, time will tell.
I'm sure people of the future will find all kinds of ethical flaws in the way we live today. After all, 500 years ago, slavery was normal and accepted. Personally, I'd bet that our mistreatment of computer programs and robots will be considered so obscene that nothing else we do will even register.