That's very true! I've found that the key to having a constructive argument is always doing your best not to hurt their ego, assign blame or back them into a corner where they'll lose face (always leave an out). Otherwise they'll slip into "defensive mode".

That together with the old chestnut "seek first to understand then to be understood" to ensure that you respect and understands their position are real game changers.

Its funny and scary how important these kind of social and interpersonal skills are working in any corporation. Yet often are lacking and leads to a lot of unnecessary friction.

It's something I almost wished was taught in schools, if only so they could recognize the patterns later when they go into working life.