Somewhere in there there is a really nice prank with a novice programmer and a one letter change.
Is that an IOCCC entry?
Off topic: are you still in the NOVA area or overseas?
Not and IOCCC entry; just something Lispers carry with them when heading towards obscure and very small territories. You might like XCL better: http://armedbear.org/ has a native optimizing compiler and compiles to ~5MB for compiler + runtime.
I live in Australia now, mate. Sydney. It's like D.C. but with a beach, nicer beer, better public transport and laid back people :-)
http://www.modeemi.fi/~chery/lisp500/lisp500c99.c