this is great testimony. it's tragically common for people to let one shameful fact define them. I find myself thinking, "i have such weird interests; when i try to explain them to others, i always fail, and feel alienated."

that's my analogue to being-a-virgin; often i let my "I am weird" be my reason to stay in on weekends, to deny my friends my company without giving a good reason.

i have to actively tell myself, "people often like me. they don't judge me [nearly] as harshly as i judge myself. they see me differently than i see myself."

i sympathize with this guy.