How sure are you that university is out of the picture? I failed most of high school and then dropped out. Eventually I decided to go to university, where I got a CS degree. I had to take a remedial Math course my first semester that didn't count towards graduation, but overall college was fairly easy and rewarding. I did graduate with student loan debt, which I'm still repaying. I got a job doing programming right after graduation and I've been thriving.

The only thing university admissions required was some kind of high school equivalency and ACT or SAT scores. I took the GED and ACT, and my scores exceeded placement requirements by a huge margin. Your mileage may vary outside of the US.

Are you certain you don't meet admissions requirements for any nearby universities? Have you checked, or are you just assuming?