I really wish the open-source JP2 situation was better. OpenJPEG is looking good but it's still in need of some performance work – which is a real shame since, as you pointed out, it'd be perfect for responsive imaging - just use HTTP byte ranges and it'd work with most proxies and caches, too.
Both Jasper support this (ilyrrates) and OpenJpeg (-r and -q) support this functionality.