"The goal is to create a happy, healthy and capable person - not an impressive 5 year old" I totally agree with this. This is a life long project. What you are looking for has to come from within, it can't be imposed from without.

If I could/had to do it all over again I would be keeping these things in mind: Pressure is bad. It's probably easier than you think to makes kids afraid to try. Keep him away from computers/TV as long as possible. Imagination is a pale and shabby thing beside them. Books build a different mind.

I would also echo the nutrition thing. I would suggest maybe a shake for breakfast with a variety of fresh/frozen fruit and some Vega One: http://myvega.com/product/vega-one-nutritional-shake/ Take a good look at the nutritional content. Hopefully that will be a habit that will sustain the kids nutritional needs while he goes through the dreaded "I'm only eating white bread and dry pasta" phase.

Good luck.