Re:For 20-Somethings, Ambition at a Cost
by ChuckMcM on Saturday March 02, 2013 @04:09PM
(#5311045)
Interesting what parenthood does to your thinking isn't it?
There is a high probability that at some point you wife will have to choose whether she wants a relationship with her daughter or she wants a daughter physician. I don't know how to characterize it but its especially hard on mothers and daughters in my observations. Of course your daughter could fall in love with the idea of being a doctor and poof, problem solved. Not to worry there is a lot of runway between now and then. Just keep your eyes open.
That said, there has always been an amazing amount of externalization (not sure if that is a thing) with kids who seem to go through the process of picking a future that would translate them into the person they want to be, for reasons that they may or may not accurately perceive. I did a Big Brothers thing in the early 80's with young men trying to find their way. They often aspired to being professional athletes. Some truly loved the game, they thought up strategies, they figured out shots they missed or things they could do better, some were focused on how many hot chicks really would just sleep with you because you were like, famous or something. Clearly, young men in the latter category weren't going to succeed against the guys in the first group.
To summarize my point, passion in a highly contested field, gives you the strength to reach your potential in spite of the setbacks. And when your kids start talking about what they want to be when they grow up, its always good to double check how they arrived at that answer.
Your daughter will have dreams, and passions, and misconceptions. As her parent your goal should be to let her find her passions, see through the misconceptions and realize her dreams. Doing that in the teen years is especially tough.
There is a high probability that at some point you wife will have to choose whether she wants a relationship with her daughter or she wants a daughter physician. I don't know how to characterize it but its especially hard on mothers and daughters in my observations. Of course your daughter could fall in love with the idea of being a doctor and poof, problem solved. Not to worry there is a lot of runway between now and then. Just keep your eyes open.
That said, there has always been an amazing amount of externalization (not sure if that is a thing) with kids who seem to go through the process of picking a future that would translate them into the person they want to be, for reasons that they may or may not accurately perceive. I did a Big Brothers thing in the early 80's with young men trying to find their way. They often aspired to being professional athletes. Some truly loved the game, they thought up strategies, they figured out shots they missed or things they could do better, some were focused on how many hot chicks really would just sleep with you because you were like, famous or something. Clearly, young men in the latter category weren't going to succeed against the guys in the first group.
To summarize my point, passion in a highly contested field, gives you the strength to reach your potential in spite of the setbacks. And when your kids start talking about what they want to be when they grow up, its always good to double check how they arrived at that answer.
Your daughter will have dreams, and passions, and misconceptions. As her parent your goal should be to let her find her passions, see through the misconceptions and realize her dreams. Doing that in the teen years is especially tough.