It is very disrespectful to come to a memorial where people are mourning a great loss and tell them that they are not allowed to mourn here.
You should frankly be incredibly ashamed. This is not a place or time to argue either, I have zero interest in carrying on a conversation with you and this is not the thread for it, so don't waste your time replying.
About your central contention, that it is "disrespectful [...] to be speaking for someone who has just died", it seems to me that, on the contrary, it is an important token of respect to take the wishes of the dead into account (as best one can make them out) when choosing how to memorialize them. Your advocacy of ignoring Hamilton's wishes is disrespectful; my advocacy of considering them is not.
> It is hard to write a simple definition of something as varied as hacking, but I think what these activities have in common is playfulness, cleverness, and exploration. Thus, hacking means exploring the limits of what is possible, in a spirit of playful cleverness. Activities that display playful cleverness have "hack value".
I do not think that Margaret Hamilton would appreciate her exploration of the limits of what is possible, which was extensive, being described as dedicated to a spirit of playful cleverness.