> getting to know the public face you present

That's exactly what I'm saying!

And by what means am I permitted, your majesty, to construct this face? May I read books to paraphrase? May I quote authors? May I practice at Toastmasters™? Maybe practice with my paychotherapist, or with my speech therapist?

You don't know, and you don't get to know. My interiority is my own.

There is no "the real me."