You misunderstand what it means to be poor

Re:You misunderstand what it means to be poor by yibg on Saturday November 15, 2025 @01:53AM (#45935551)

Definitely agree on the mentality it creates and how long it lasts. I’m fairly well off now, but grew up very poor. First developing world poor where running water and toilets were shared with the whole building, the whole family crammed into a single room. Then western world poor, where my parents and some friends that lived together (to save money) would walk to get groceries, buy one bus ticket to have one person carry the groceries on the bus most of the way back, and the rest of the group walk to the bus station and help to carry the groceries the rest of the way home.

Silicon Valley engineer income and wealth now, but still extremely uncomfortable spending money that isn’t necessary. My partner grew up quite differently and doesn’t understand why I’m so frugal with money given my relatively high income.

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Re:You misunderstand what it means to be poor by djtango on Saturday November 15, 2025 @02:04AM (#45935587)

Something I find interesting is that my mother grew up in similar conditions - poor in Borneo in the 50s, my aunt was literally born in the jungle while hiding from the Japanese

And yet my mum's family were raised that they were broke, not poor.

There were definitely some echoes/overlap like we were raised that wasting food is one of the most egregious sins one can ever commit, and my mum has a compulsion of overpacking things with meat after growing up eating nothing but I know that she is definitely more broke than poor and was therefore able to reverse her fortunes.

Similarly, if you know people who grew up in Mainland China during the early years of the PRC, you can tell that while everyone had it tough, some people were poor while others were broke and this then can help explain the divergences of their outcomes when riding the wave of growth.

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Re:You misunderstand what it means to be poor by yibg on Saturday November 15, 2025 @04:39AM (#45936236)

I think also perhaps the reasons for being poor. My family was poor but so was everyone else. It was structural. So as a result (my hypothesis), there wasn’t even the hope of being rich, just not so poor. So for instance the mentality was always to save, not invest, because no one has the money to invest could afford to lose whatever meager savings there was.

As a result my up bringing was filled with lessons to play it safe, don’t take risks, get a stable job etc.

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Re:You misunderstand what it means to be poor by dijit on Sunday November 16, 2025 @03:44AM (#45943640)

Same here.

Its interesting that the same mentalities that get us out of poverty are not the same ones that make people rich.

You could naively assume that competence around money would be universal.

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