Naturally, this difference becomes big when two objects are close together, since the acceleration will induce a large change of velocity, and a lower time step is needed to keep the error under control.
Your solution sounds interesting, but isn't it only practical when you have a small number of bodies?
If you see bodies flung out after close passes, three solutions are available: reduce the time step, use a higher order time integrator, and (the most common method) add regularization. Regularization (often called "softening") removes the singularity by adding a constant to the squared distance. So 1 over zero becomes one over a small-ish and finite number.
IIRC that is what I did in the end. It is fudge, but it works.
Optimistic fixed time steps are just going to work well almost always and almost everywhere, accumulating errors behind your back at every episode of close approach.
But in our simulation (reality, or whatever), uncertainty increases the closer we look.
Does that suggest we don’t live in a simulation? Or is “looking closer increases uncertainty” something that would emerge from a nested simulation?
And yes that's a dramatic over-simplification of uncertainty principle, but it conveys the concept perfectly.
https://alvinng4.github.io/grav_sim/5_steps_to_n_body_simula...