https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gG4BJ23BFBE is a presentation that best represents my view on the kind of mindset that's long overdue to become the new norm in our industry.
Assertions in release builds are a bad idea since they can be fairly expensive. It is a better idea to have a different variety of assertion like the verify statements that OpenZFS uses, which are assertions that run even in release builds. They are used in situations where it is extremely important for an assertion to be done at runtime, without the performance overhead of the less important assertions that are in performance critical paths.
I think it's a philosophical difference of opinions and it's one of the things that drive Rust, Go, C# etc. ahead - not merely language ergonomics (I hope Zig ends up as the language that replaces C). The society at large is mostly happy to take a 1-3% perf hit to get rid of buffer overflows and other UB-inducing errors.
But I agree with you on not having "expensive" asserts in releases.