Yes, especially for something creative and collaborative like engineering. Creating a culture where remote work works as well as in person is hard, and takes explicit effort and buying from management.

I agree to some degree - it's only hard at the very beginning. After that, it just becomes a part of the company culture. And you can feel it from the first days when you are onboarded or when you struggle with your first ticket.

Yes employers do care about commute. Commute time is one of the leading predictors of turnover, and it has a more dramatic effect on employee happiness vs higher salary. Also, it's de facto culture for programmers to work a little everywhere, on and off the clock (I'm not saying that's right, but it's reality).

A certain well known big defense company used to subsidize rent if you agreed to live closer.