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Re:Ask HN: How can I learn to better command people's attent... by wruza on Thursday January 09, 2025 @05:08AM (#42643705)
The big eye opener for me was the discovery that different groups of people actually react differently to me. I.e. I was simply friends with people who ... didn't care as much about me as I cared about them

I second this. Make sure you’re in the right “layer” because this mismatch can induce the described avoidance/insignificance. And even if you want to stay there (which is absolutely fine) don’t take it as a global thing. Different groups may value completely different behavior patterns.

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