> The real problem is if the man in a dress, and his associates, try to strongarm everyone into pretending he's a woman
Exactly, which is why he's not seen as simply "a man in a dress", but "a man in a dress who will call on a mob to force me to adopt their norms as if they are my own, contrary to my visceral instincts".
People don't like having to be FORCED to conform to someone else's ideology, we used to call this "fascism".
There's nothing wrong with a man wearing a dress, just like there's nothing wrong with women wearing trousers and shirts. The real problem is if the man in a dress, and his associates, try to strongarm everyone into pretending he's a woman, and in doing so negatively impact on free speech and women's rights.
Somehow this message has been lost and we're back to reinforcing gender stereotypes again. It's very unfortunate.