I think you hit the nail on the head with your distinction between knowledge and anxiety, although I think you over specify it a littls when you say _verbal_ knowledge. The same exact thing is true for _textual_ threats.

At least for me, the physical aspects of bullying never mattered much. As you say, you can simply punch back. What mattered to me was the excluding otherness I felt never getting to be part of the collective. I still struggle with that.

Ironically, social media sort of helped me there. Forums led me to people who would accept me. I played games with people, I could chat with them, they were willing to accept me.