Unfortunately, emails (at least in my context) are rich text, and they pretty frequently include images that I care about. I don't think gnus can handle that, given that it looks CLI-only.

But also, it looks like I'd have to do some substantial elisp work to get filtering, etc. working. This is starting to sound like way more work than hitting Ignore on a Slack thread. Maybe it's great once you get it set up, and assuming nobody sends you rich text where you care about the formatting?