I think insulin resistance from excess calorie and carbohydrate consumption has a lot to do with it. One of the symptoms of hyperglycemia is increased hunger, since glucose is staying in your blood stream instead of getting into your cells. 1/3 Americans have prediabetes, and more than that are probably developing insulin resistance.
> And yet most obese people are no more addicted to food than you are addicted to oxygen...
Most obese people seem to be addicted to sugary food, soft drings, desert and all that, which then triggers more eating.
In addition, it might be a gut bacteria thing. If your gut is used to processing lots of sugar, you crave it even more and fighting your gut microbiome requires way too much impulse control and moderation.
The solution might be to recognize this mechanism, remove all sugar from the diet and find a way to control impulses for a few weeks until the gut bacteria changed.
Drinking water and chewing sugar-free gum helps me to remove food cravings temporarily with no downsides. But... I have a normal weight.