For me the difference between wired and wireless over the ear headphones is not noticeable - they are heavy both and I'm okay with that. Also noise cancelling is a bonus for both, even when it's bad it's already nice. Yeah that means I am not interested in open back - I don't want everybody listening along and me hearing everybody as well. But I wear headphones only outside so for the studio or home based folks the requirements list might be very different.

> I hate earbuds - they hurt my ears - and over-ear wireless headphones are all huge and hot.

Speaking as somebody who always finds earbuds unreliably loose or uncomfortably tight, have your tried ones that individually hook over each ear?

While that description does include some over-ear designs [0] others are more like "sporty earbuds" [1].

For the lattee, I find I can usually let them hang freely and maybe turn up the volume a bit to compensate for not having a great seal.

[0] Example: Panasonic RP-HZ47

[1] Example: Panasonic RP-HS16K