There is definitely a strange stereotype of suburbs in online discourse. Pretty much every suburb I’ve been part of (6 or 7 across 4 states) have been quiet with low traffic, low speeds, and even kids playing outside. About half of those it is possible to walk to school and some shops safely without crossing major thoroughfares. The suburb where I live now, when school is out there are high schoolers walking home and crossing large roads in packs of around a dozen.

There’s decent choice when house shopping, at least the places I’ve lived. If someone chooses a suburb surrounded by 2 miles of other suburbs, that’s their choice. There’s plenty of “old city” suburbs (what used to be the edge of town 25 years or 50 years back) that now have sidewalks and stuff nearby. HN trends wealthy though, so I imagine many people only look at housing on the current city edges.