That's kind of the crazy part though - how the hell does something you use and abuse every day, that you by definition leave out in the elements, not depreciate? Or at the very least, it is messed up that the depreciation is so minimal compared to the appreciation of the home (and not the land)

The land I can see. Land is in limited supply; AFAIK it's mostly just Hawai'i that's making more on occasion, and that's about it. But the actual building should depreciate.

The land is the asset, the bet is generally that the land will appreciate faster than the house will depreciate. This has generally been true in large metro areas and regional hubs, as net migration to those areas has been positive. That changed a bit during COVID with remote work, but most employers now seem to want at least partial physical presence.

You seem to assume that people living in their home will spend nothing on maintenance and upkeep. In my experience, the mortgage is about half the expense of owning a home.