I'm not joking, at all.

I have never heard of this actually happening outside of when iPhone is a topic on HN. I don't really have other social media, so that might be a part of it. But in real life? Never once experienced this, or even know someone who has.

my friend group has a separate group chat for just android users and they get party invites after the main group does.

This makes no sense to me. You exclude some portion of your friends because your text bubble is green instead of blue? Why?

It absolutely happens in real life because of basic human nature. It creates friction in relationships, and even the most minimal amount of unecessary friction can cause divides or make it harder to connect. You seem to underestimate how lazy people can be.

Imagine in 2010 you meet a potential romantic partner and they say, "Hey! Add me on Facebook!" And you reply, "Oh, I'm not on Facebook... can we just talk on the phone instead?" The person may go, "Oh, umm... sure, I guess." But then you never connect because you haven't made it as easy as possible; you've introduced a tiny amount of friction that a lot of people are just not willing to tolerate. If everyone else is on Facebook, why aren't you?

In real life, it creates so much friction that yes, there is pressure to buy an iPhone and change your entire software ecosystem just to fit in and remove this barrier to relationships. It's just text messaging; it's ancient technology at this point and no company should have a monopoly on it in any form. At a minimum they should let other operating systems download iMessage—show them ads, charge a fee, I don't know. But creating a hardware-enforced wall around basic telecommunication is wrong.

>It creates friction in relationships

I do not understand how the color of a chat bubble creates friction. I text Android friends the same way I text iPhone friends. We exchange phone numbers, then we text each other.

This must be some kind of sharp generational divide, right? I'm over 40 and I can't think of anything that has made me feel as old as I do reading the "green message shame" discourse.

Anybody from any generation has experienced this is some form or fashion, don't be coy.

the chat bubble color misses the point. it's more the loss of features. because as soon as you add a single android user the experience degrades. reacting becomes clunkier and imessage exclusive features wont work. so it's better to manage two chats

> my friend group has a separate group chat for just android users and they get party invites after the main group does.

This is beyond ridiculous. All of my group chats that need to be cross-platform just move to Facebook Messenger or WhatsApp

that's the problem. not everyone has that, but we've had the same number since middle school. sms is the default. i could delete fb tomorrow.