Agreed. I still hit all kinds of issues, and recently struggled to fill a "lead" role on a project because I couldn't keep track of everything. That was part of my motivation to finally do something about it.

> Software Engineering is a really forgiving field for those of us with ADHD

We have wildly different experiences then.

It's almost made me reconsider my life choices. I love programming, but it does not love me apparently. All the meetings, tickets, remember to do this, do that, focus on X and not Y, etc..

If I worked in a factory, I would not have reached 40 with all of my limbs, so at least there's that...

What point are you trying to convey? You were built for software engineering solely because you can't be maimed by software?

It really depends. There is no shortage of startups out there with minimal meetings and plenty of fires for you to choose from at any given time to take care of. There are also companies where you can't do anything unless you get a formal approval of your manager and their manager and their manager's manager. It's a whole spectrum (ha).

This has been my experience. It depends on your role and on the org you're with (and often the size of the org).

I've worked exclusively for startups my entire career and, for me, it's easier to hide my ADHD symptoms in the chaos of a startup. Further, there's tons of novelty in startups and many opportunities to learn something that was previous outside your wheel house.

Of course, there are downsides to startups (e.g. career stability) so it's not for everyone.