> How do you reconcile believing that you improve your software against the idea that others make theirs worse?

It all depends. As an employee, I just accept that there's little I can do about the whole situation because the causes of it are things I have no control over[1]. This issue is actually one of the ones that gets me thinking that there isn't much room for engineers like me in the software industry anymore.

With my own software, I do have that control, so I avoid the practices that I think are leading to not optimizing for quality.

[1] In my current position, my employer does not engage in the practices that I think are problematic, and I am proud of the quality of our work. But it's a special case because we produce industrial machinery and the software has to be rock solid when shipped, constant updating isn't possible, etc.