If I try to visualise anything, a balloon for example, I have to dig down to a memory that contained a balloon such as a birthday party and then I feel the experience of the balloon being there and only see the color it was. The rest of the balloon is more of a feeling, there is no real shape to it.

I also can’t see/imagine faces or voices, even that of my wife or people I see almost daily. Even when I actively focus on a person, then close my eyes, they disappear within a second or two. I do see some random constructions of snippets of memories that constantly morph and disappear into the darkness of my eyelids.

I never understood this as I can dream vividly, right after I wake up I can shortly still see the faces of those that were present, even those that were fully imagined/constructed non-existing people.

I have been recently diagnosed with ADHD&Autism and am curious about other peoples experiences, do you experience the same? Do you have any diagnosis?