I have not run into this attitude in tech from executives. Finance is much more of a heiracy culture I guess.

I have run into this at a peer level though. I've negotiated WFH and extra vacation and have learned to keep it in the down low. They get mad at me, but I'm not the one that is their boss and I couldn't care less if they WFH.

It certainly varies. I've had a casual relationship with senior execs (subject of course to understanding that they get to make the decisions at the end of the day). However, I've heard the stories about some senior execs that are of the mindset of "Don't make eye contact with me unless you've been spoken to." I didn't quite believe it at first because it's never been my experience but it's a thing.

I haven't taken a month-long vacation for a while but when I did a few times in a long-ago role, there were definitely people who were at least a bit incredulous that I could get off with doing so.

> it's never been my experience but it's a thing

Yes it is a thing. It starts when you get promoted to a more senior role. The thing is, nothing much changed inside or outside, so many people feel they need to make a point. They start to dress differently, behave differently, introduce distance - to make sure others understand who is in the "superior" position.

I noticed thin in insecure types or those who need some confirmation of their value. But there are many people who are exact opposites, especially in the younger generation. They understand that being a manager doesn't mean giving orders but supporting your team in their work. It's so much easier for everybody.

There are executive-class perks in most medium-to-large companies, but at least in tech, they're kept on the down low so you have to kind of look for them to find them. Personal assistants are probably the most visible. Private meeting rooms / bathrooms / entrances for the executives, chauffeurs, cooks, masseuses, access to corporate jets, hard-to-get tickets to sporting / arts events, separate housing allowances and company-paid villas, personal security, lots of financial perks like wealth management tools, free tax services, deferred comp and supplemental retirement savings. But these things don't tend to get flashed in front of the worker-bees.

I thought it was understood executive bathrooms are for the hookers and blow.

Almost all of those perks have been given to line techies since Google was founded.

> they're kept on the down low so you have to kind of look for them to find them

That's basically my point.

Have seen similar. IMHO it falls under the umbrella HR created to keep us from discussing salary, too. A completely legal (US) thing employees can do.

Small biz bros are worse. My wife left finance to work for a small (50-200) person business for a few years. Couple brothers that inherited it from daddy. Got all their kids / kids friends nepobaby jobs.

Probably the worst scenario of business owners you can work for.

Toxic small businesses can be really toxic. There's a lot of this in northern Italy, which is actually a pretty productive, wealthy area. But they'd be better off if there was more consolidation and some new blood. Tons of companies where grandpa founded it after WWII, and worked his hands to the bone. The son inherited it, maybe went to college and grew it and improved it some, and the grandkids are all about booze and cars and women.

OTOH, a good small company can be really good. Decisions get made quickly, you know most of the people and can talk with them, much less BS, and more of a sense of purpose in what you're doing there rather than being a cog. I worked in one a few years back and loved it. They are tough to find, though, as a real 'small company' is different than a startup in that they're a bit less crazy in terms of growth.

Small businesses can have their own set of issues which are probably different than those you encounter at a big company but they can be just as bad or worse. (Oh, and if you're in business for yourself, you need to do a lot of selling and need to deal with clients directly.)