Welp now I know what to say, thanks!

Seems like the correct response is no response because you don't want to confirm that the number is in active use? They must at least record a bit that you replied, which makes your number a more valuable commodity.

This is the actual correct answer, yes, but I figure if I can get them trying to scam me then they’ll spend less time trying to scam my grandpa… I’m probably wrong these days; it’s probably a ScamGPT instance, but it brings me joy.

This is why I always answer telemarketers if I'm not waiting for an actual call.

1) answer

2) go mm-hmmm to their first question

3) phone on mute and set it on the table and go about my day

I think the record for a telemarketer monologue is a bit over 3 minutes before they figured out I'm not responding. That was 3 minutes they weren't scamming anyone else to subscribe to whatever. I'm practically a human Tarpit for telemarketers =)

I'm glad someone else is on the same page. When I get the "Is this Roger?" or whatever texts, it's always "Yes. I got the merchandise you requested. We'll handle the trade off behind the loading dock at midnight. Make sure to come alone."