Likely your stated and revealed preferences are different. A place I noticed this was tech people (who are not in ad-tech) talking about advertisements: "Just describe the thing to me and if I like the specs and functionality, I'll buy it" but then when they go to buy the thing it's more of the thing that's not doing that and any time anything does that it's "oh that's cool but if it did X" but then the thing they end up buying won't do X either.

The best way to get people to interact with you a certain way is to reward them for interacting with you that way, and you likely don't. Not because that's a failure of you but it's just how people (all of us) act.

The world isn't a co-operative multi-tasking OS. We're more like the human body: a multi-agent conglomerate whose component organisms communicate via signals that are filtered and processed. Sometimes a pathogen mimics signals well enough. Other times we detect it. But the system wouldn't work if every participant trusted the counterparty.